Blind as a...

By Lurking Tentacle

Hydra flowed through the halls of the mansion, feeling much better. Breakfast was always more satisfying when prepared under threat of petrification. It gave the cooks that little extra motivation they needed.

It was mid morning, an ungodly hour to be up as far as Hydra was concerned. Normally she would never be up so early. She'd still have been asleep if that Satyr hadn't stumbled into her cave. The curious girl had been quickly dealt with by the cranky serpent, roused from her slumber. Only one thing on her mind, Hydra had tried to get back to sleep on her new Satyr shaped pillow, but she just couldn't get comfortable. Dejectedly, she dragged herself up and slunk off to the house, not in any frame of mind to prepare her own food.

Now, though still in a slightly bitter mood, she was somewhat more manageable. She wondered what to amuse herself with. As she passed a door, a loud snoring drew her attention to it. She recognized that particular racket. Raising an eyebrow, she quietly opened the door and peeked inside.

On a table in the center of the room was a large antique dollhouse. The details were exquisite, even down to the twelve-inch tall mailman standing on the porch, a tiny Publisher's Clearing House letter in his hand. On second thought, he seemed a little out of place next to the Victorian house.

Stealthily, Hydra crept around the elaborate model home. The backside had no walls, allowing for the easy viewing of the miniature rooms.

On a chair in one of the lower rooms there was a small girl, about a foot tall. She was dressed as a maid, sitting with her hands crossed over her lap. She looked ordinary enough, save for the key emerging from her back. Her eyes followed Hydra, but she made no other move.

However the loud noise was coming from a bedroom on the second story. Hanging from the four-poster bed, which looked to be just her size, was Bat. She had her wings wrapped around herself and was snoring loud enough, it seemed, to shatter windows.

Hydra sneered at the obnoxious noise, but then grinned as she spied something on the nightstand next to the bed. She snatched them up, suppressing her evil laughter. She slid out of the room quietly, closing the door after her.


Some time later, Bat yawned loudly. Stretching her wings, they just about brushed the walls of the room. She dropped down tiredly, falling limply onto the mattress. She groped around on the nightstand with her foot. When she couldn't find what she was looking for right away, she began to search more desperately. Sitting up, she lifted the hair from her eyes with her thumb claw. "Where the..." She said, squinting hard. She looked closely, but was unable to find anything. She turned around to hop off the bed, and slammed right into the bedpost. "Ouch..." She moaned, rubbing her forehead.


With a loud ruckus and some swearing, Bat came tumbling down the stairs. Weakly, she crawled over to the girl sitting nearby. Getting to her feet, she grabbed her by the shoulders. "Where are my glasses," She said crossly, shaking the girl.

She stared back at Bat impassively, blinking a few times.

"Oh right," Bat muttered. Leaning forward, their chests pressed together, she hooked her thumbs on the key and turned it a few times.

"Mistress," The girl immediately piped up, "Hydra came in while you were sleeping and took them."

"Oh not again!" Bat said angrily. "She's NOT going to get away with it this time," She swore. She stomped out the door, or at least tried to, instead her head became intimately acquainted with the door jam.

"Are you ok ma'am?" The maid said, moving to help her.

"Get off, I don't need yer help!" Bat shoved her away. Getting up, she made it through the door this time.

"She has such beautiful eyes," The wind up maid thought to herself. She cringed, as there was another crash from hall.


Bat pulled herself raggedly through the door into another room, looking worse for wear. This one was mostly devoid of furniture. Various large trinkets were scattered around, along with a few rods. This was one of the places she kept the magical things that she'd pinched from the Sorceress' stash of "trivial" items. She snatched the first wand she came across. "Which one is this?" She asked herself, trying to make out the fuzzy details of the thing. "Like it matters," She decided. Gripping it tightly, she hopped off the back of the house and flew directly into the closed window with a thud. "Not a word!" She bit out, picking herself up.

The maid closed her mouth, looking down on Bat worriedly.


For some reason she couldn't explain, Hydra was feeling an overabundance of self-satisfaction. She sighed as a light breeze blew through the trees, feeling infinitely better than she had when she'd first been rudely awakened that morning. Idly, she flicked her new earring. The small lenses glinted in the warm sunlight.

"Hyyyydra!" An infuriated voice broke the tranquility of the forest.

Hydra, seeing the threat, leaned her bodies in either direction.

Bat swooped right between them, smacking into a tree.

"Having sssome trouble?" Hydra smiled.

Still a little dizzy, Bat hefted her weapon at the blur that sounded right.

Startled, Hydra ducked. Behind her, a potted plant was struck by the zig zagging beam and changed into a cucu clock.

"Gimme back my glasses you cold blooded cretin!" Bat said, taking off into a rather irregular flight.

Deciding that getting hit by this particular wand might be a really bad, Hydra opted for a quick retreat.

Bat chased the fuzzy, serpentine figure, taking potshots at her. She was interrupted by the occasional branch, letting her prey gain a lead. She cursed her weakness. Some species of bat had fairly sharp eyesight, but the Sorceress certainly had no need for such scientific knowledge.

Hydra quickly ducked behind a tree, trying to lose her pursuer.

Farther down the path, a female oak suddenly was hit by the magical ray and found herself free, albeit sporting horns and other bovine features. The cowgirl looked down at herself, and promptly fainted. Being a tree had been traumatizing enough.

Bat landed on a branch, or more precisely, scrabbled onto one she'd collided with. She gazed about blearily, pulling her hair out of her eyes, trying to locate Hydra.

Hydra, for her part, remained perfectly still, waiting to counterattack. She tensed as Bat declared, "Ha!" but the little pest proceeded to leap from her branch and fly off in the opposite direction. Hydra sat there in her hiding spot for a moment, dumbfounded. She shook her heads as she turned away. "Blind little fool," She chuckled to herself. In the forest behind her, as she slithered away, she heard the distressed sounds of Bat's poorly aimed vengeance.

Whether she'd given away her location, or it was only a stray shot, she'd never find out. Hydra suddenly found herself locked in place. On either end of a long stone bench, her bodies were curved stylishly into an s-shape. Her new form fit in nicely along the path.

She waited, but Bat didn't show up. "Great," She thought, "Maybe if I'm lucky she won't even notice. But then, I might be here for a while," She sighed in aggravation. "At least she didn't get her glasses back," She consoled herself.


Meanwhile, a few acres away, a couple of lost hikers trudged through the bush.

"I'm telling you, we're lost," The blonde said. "Gimmie the map," She said, swiping at it.

"Cut it out Cindy, you can't even read a map," The brunette said, holding it out of reach of the shorter girl.

"Sure I can-" She started as a bolt struck them from somewhere in the forest. "Did you just feel something Robin?" She asked suddenly.

"No, of course not," She said. She failed to notice that instead of holding the map above her with her hands, as she'd been doing a moment ago, it was now suspended by the twin coils of a long tail.

"Um, are you sure?" Cindy asked, looking down at herself. In place of her legs, she was attached to the same serpentine body that her friend was.

"What are you-" Robin began, looking over. She narrowed her eyes at Cindy upon noticing their condition. "This is your fault."

"How could it possibly be my fault?" The blonde defended.

"I don't know, but I'm sure it is," Robin told her.

"Aha! Got you now you legless lisping lout!" Bat cried in triumph.

The conjoined girls attention snapped to the little creature.

To someone with such bad eyesight, they were definitely Hydra, no doubt about it.


Twin feminine screams echoed over the forest.

"Oh, that sounded like a good one," Hydra thought sourly.

All artwork is copyrighted by it's respective owners.

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