Diogenes' Goal

BY: Dr. Mercurious

There's a fountain in Boss' garden, made before I came here, that I love to sun myself on. Picture a statue of a young woman, hair swept back, kneeling on a rock -- clad in her birthday suit. The statue cups the bottom of her breasts, a look of ecstasy on her face. A stream of water comes out of each nipple and pours into the stone basin that makes up its base. It's a nice piece of work and, due to my lactation fetish, never fails to get me moist.

Today is one of the days that I took it a little further. I perched on the statue's head and was rubbing myself with one wing, in no particular hurry to get off. Usually the Boss' statues are noisy -- I can hear them because I'm her Familiar, but someone else would have to be right next to one to catch even a whimper. This is one of the silent ones. It happens every so often; she turns a 'guest' into a statue and the shock makes them catatonic. They're no fun to tease but then again I'm not interested in conversation when I come here.

So, because I wasn't expecting it, I was more than a little surprised when, as I finally came, I hear a voice in my head say glad to see you're enjoying yourself.

I shrieked aloud and dove for the nearest bush, pursued by silent laughter. It's not the unexpected that startles me -- Boss is the Sorceress, and anyone in her employ gets used of the unexpected quickly -- but what the contact signifies. The statues can't initiate conversation with me unless they possessed some magical talent before they were transformed, and her comment on 'seeing' even though her eyes were closed meant she could still use that talent a little.

I decided I had to be careful. I sauntered out of the bush and tried to look nonchalant. "I'm surprised Boss let you live."

I am no threat to the Sorceress I fear, the fountain sighed. You, however, are.

I flit to the rim of the fountain's basin. "So you say."

As her Familiar, she insisted, you can influence her in ways she cannot counter. Why do you think those who practice the Arts shy away from intelligent creatures when looking for one?

"I see," I nodded. "And you'll tell me what those 'ways' are if I agree to have you turned back to normal?"

I tried to keep the sarcasm out of my voice, but she's a sharp cookie and picks up on it right away. I take it the answer is no.

"Right-o, hon."

But you are her slave. Why do you put up with such an existence?

Maybe it was because I thought the fountain was sexy, and maybe because she sounded genuinely curious without a hint of derision. Whatever the reason, I decided to answer her. "Let me tell you a story. A while back a traveling theater group sent a request to perform for the Sorceress in the hopes of getting a fat payoff. The Sorceress, intrigued by their boldness, agreed. They arrived at her tower, whereupon the leader of the troupe made this flowery speech she recognized as having been lifted from a famous play. She didn't expect much, but decided to give them a chance anyway. She couldn't help but notice a dwarf-life, ugly girl chained so she can't run far, but she discounted her for the moment, as the actors were beginning their play. The little woman, for her part, knew how talented the members of the troupe were -- or rather, weren't. She had tried to warn them this was a bad idea, but they only laughed and beat her harder than was customary. She was the troupe's slave, bought at a young age and used to do everything that the other troupe members hated. She knew that her masters were going to annoy this great woman, and had prepared a little something just for the occasion."

"She wasn't wrong, as it turned out. The actors were nervous facing this legend, and it made their performances worse than usual. The Sorceress soon grew tired of it, then annoyed. Finally, when one of the singers' voices cracked badly during a song, she flew into a rage and began to transform them into various items for use about her castle. That's when the clever little woman made her move. As the Sorceress methodically went down the membership of the whole theater company the dwarf recited a poem she had written about her. It praised the Sorceress' power, and claimed she had every right to do the things she did because she was so much better than everyone else."

"Finally, it was her turn."

"She gave her a smile and said 'You seem to have more wit and talent than these others, so I will give you a choice; what would you like to be turned into?'"

"She answered; 'Oh great Sorceress, I would not presume to dictate to you how to practice your art, but if you would make of me something to aid you in dispensing your will I would consider my life complete.'"

"She smiled and cast her spell. The dwarf shrank to a foot tall and her body slimmed out, her breasts growing perky. Her arms lengthened and her hands stretched out, becoming bat-wings. Her ears grew large, and she developed fangs. As a final touch, she became covered in short brown fur. 'Henceforth you shall be my Familiar Bat,' the Sorceress said, 'and my domain shall be yours to call home, its prisoners a source for your amusement.'"

And Bat lived happily ever after, the fountain finished. Even after everything the Sorceress took away from the little woman.

I shrugged. "She didn't take anything from me, when you think about it. So what if I'm shorter than anyone else? I already was, so no change there. So what if I don't have hands anymore? I can fly, I've got prehensile feet, and you wouldn't believe my hearing. So what if I'm a slave? I was a slave before, only I have great job perks." I grinned. "Real great."

You enjoy the cruelties she inflicts, the fountain accused. You take pleasure in watching her victims suffer and delight in making their torments worse. You are truly no better than the Sorceress.

I flew down to the ground and picked up a mound of moss with my talons. "You know something? You're right." I flew up to the statue's shoulder with my burden. "Then again, neither is anyone else. I'm just honest about it." I crawled down to a nipple with a large wad of the moss and stuffed it in the hole. Just as I figured, it slowed the stream down to a faint trickle.

What are you doing? The fountain demanded. That feels...

"Uncomfy?" I smirked and moved to the other nipple with another wad, repeating the process. "That's the idea, although it'll probably feel worse as the water backs up; can't have you making mischief behind my back. Think of it as getting caught up on all the teasing you didn't get all these years." I flitted back down to the edge of the basin. "Don't worry; if I decide not to tell the Sorceress about you, I'll be back tomorrow and clean you out if I feel like stopping by, that is."

With a smile on my face and the fountain's wail of pain in my head, I took to the air. My goal was the Sorceress' Tower; I could feel the Boss waking up, and that meant it was time for my morning feeding -- breast milk, straight from the Boss' tits!

"I love my life," I said aloud to no one in particular.


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